How to Feel Joy Again When You’re Struggling with Anxiety & Body Acceptance

When stress or anxiety rises, and you're struggling with body image or how you feel about yourself, the first thing to go is the ability to connect with joy, play and creativity.

And that makes sense. From a biological perspective, safety comes first.

If you're genuinely in a dangerous situation, you don't need to access joy, and the main priority there is the need for safety.

But if you're having a really stressful day at work, feeling overwhelmed with something or having a difficult day in general, and your nervous system is perceiving danger and causing you to spiral, this is where small, simple moments of joy and creativity are incredibly powerful!

Dopamine dressing or wearing your favourite colour can be a quick pick me up!

Connecting with joy doesn't have to be grand gestures, expensive trips, and it doesn't need to take loads of time out of your day.

True embodiment of something means you are living it; it's in your beliefs, behaviours, actions and perception of yourself and the world around you.

It's something you can access, without needing to look too far from yourself.

For me, wearing a lot of yellow brings me joy (it's my favourite colour).

Being with friends, loved ones and pets also bring us a lot of joy and can strengthen our sense of self, purpose and worth, along with many other wonderful benefits, however if you constantly search outside of yourself for happiness and joy, it can be disappointing when people don't meet your expectations, let you down or simply aren't around when you need them.

If you can learn to embody joy for yourself and know how to tap into it, it becomes a real anchor in times of distress. Joy, creativity and play are all crucial for human and social development, and they are positive reinforcement for holistic wellbeing.

Meet yourself where you're at

The first thing in here is meeting yourself where you're at.

One persons requirement and capacity for joy, will be totally different to the next person. With as much kindness as you can, to take into account your life circumstances and how this might be impacting joy in your life; consider time constraints, caring responsibilities, health, finances and anything else which might cause you to say 'I can't' or 'I don't have time'.

Be Intentional

This can be challenging to begin with, but over time it becomes a natural way of being; this is the embodiment piece! It's your own blueprint of nourishment.

This isn't toxic positivity, learning to be 'calm' all the time or about 'fixing' yourself, but more about accessing a felt sense of contentment, pleasure, comfort or stability in the present moment.

We can hold the awareness of reality; challenges, pain and suffering, and still choose joy as a source of support and stability. It becomes a balm for the pain, frustration and fear.

How to begin to sense into more Joy

Start small and take baby steps.

Think of manageable ways that bring just a little light and relief to your day, and how you feel on the inside. Little micro-moments of joy that make you smile, soften the tension in your stomach or reduces the flighty feeling of panic.

Here are a few suggestions...

🌿 When is your favourite moment of the day?

Is it your morning coffee, commute to work, evening walk, or picking up your kids from school. Maybe it's eating dinner with a loved one, with no screens or doing something crafty at the weekend...

How often do you pay close attention to it, or just go through the motions as it's something you do often?

• Make it INTENTIONAL; Tune into all of your senses as much as possible and really try to savour the moment. What is it about this particular activity or moment that brings joy? What lets you know that joy is here? Is there anything to notice, sense or feel within yourself during this time.

☀️ Gratitude Reflection / Journal before bed

If might sound cliche, and I know some people have a love-hate relationship with gratitude journaling, but it can be really powerful - when we take it from just being our thoughts and mind-level awareness, to focusing on the physical sensations, movements or images within ourselves, as we reflect on what we're grateful for.

• Make it INTENTIONAL; Spend some time reflecting on your day and think of a few joyful moments or things you are genuinely thankful for - It could be your favourite moment of the day! No matter how small you think it is, it's relevant here. Once again, observe if there are any sensations or shifts within your body. What lets you know that gratitude is alive within you? It could be a feeling of openness, releasing your jaw or furrowed brow. It could be a feeling of warmth in your heart, or a pleasant image.

🐈 Do you have a hobby that is just for fun?

Pick something that you can do that is literally just for fun and pleasure! If you work all the time (or you've turned your hobbies into work), and often say 'I don't have time for that', then I'm speaking to you!

No agenda, no perfectionism needed, no reason to do it other than it makes you happy and relaxed. If you haven't got a lot of time, that's ok. Find something that you can commit to for as least 10 minutes and see how you get on?

This could be writing short stories, doodling shapes and colouring them in, scrap booking your favourite colour or recipes. Perhaps it's sewing, knitting, cooking or dopamine dressing!

• Make it INTENTIONAL; Savour the moment. As you're engaging with your hobby, sense and feel your body in the present moment, slow down your breathing, your movements and be fully engaged in what you're doing. What do you notice, if anything, when you shift from thinking to feeling?

Fill a sketchbook or scrap book with scribbles of your favourite colour, shapes or images!

Over time, the sense of contentment and inner joy becomes a way of being, rather than an after thought.

It becomes a way of bringing stability to your nervous system, when you are feeling disproportionately anxious, in relation to what's happening around you.

This way of connecting with joy and creativity in every day life, can be helpful for taking time away from the noise or the challenges, whilst helping you to be present with your life and experiences, rather than disconnecting further or numbing out in harmful ways.

Joy becomes a nurturing source of support and a reminder that as humans, we are designed to create, play and connect with beauty, magic and wonder around us! It's not selfish, silly or pointless to do things that are joyful, especially when it helps you navigate through the dark times.

🌀 What comes to mind when you think of creating more space in your life for joy?

🌀 How might you begin and explore this over the coming month?

With Love,

Sophie xx

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